Mr. President! You’re Going The Wrong Way!!

(Que Mission Impossibe Theme music)

The elevator jolts into motion and the slow movement up begins. There are only a few moments left before Mr. President and his secret service escort make it to the 14^th floor. They were originally supposed to be on the 13^th floor but upon arrival it was discovered that there are no 13^th floors in hotels because it’s bad luck and there’s too much superstition about it. They’ve made it this far, but there’s still the last hallway to go. When the elevator gets to the top they will be at the final obstacle. Finger guns are in the ready position, pointed up at the ceiling with both hands together. As the floors tick bye there’s no telling if it will stop and let the bad guys on. All they can do is wait the last few agonizingly slow seconds as the floors go by. It slows as 12 counts up to 14 and jolts to a halt. *DING*

You Lost WHAT??!

It all started when it was discovered the nuclear football had been left in the presidential limo still parked in the parking garage. After a successful trip to Sticky Fingers, a legendary Chattanooga BBQ joint, the 1^st Family had made their way back to the fanciest Marriot ever built. I mean seriously, this place was like 50 stories tall of huge glass windows and it was in the middle of downtown. Pretty sure there were valet drivers, conference rooms, complimentary fancy water, the whole nine yards.

Anyways, back to the story. In their dazed state from the near food induced coma, a critical error had been made. No one thought to grab the single most important piece of luggage. All the nuclear launch codes for every missile in the country and on every sub were in the briefcase that only Mr. President could carry. If they acted fast, they might be able to beat the bad guys to it. It had to be a small task force of just the Head of Secret Service so they could be incognito. Too large of a group would cause alarm and clue the bad guys into the mistake.

Let’s Roll!!

“Mr. President, let’s go. We have to get down there and get that briefcase before they do.” Out the door they ran and straight down the hallway to the nearest elevator. Mr. President should have been a little more careful to take note of his surroundings as they made their way from the room to the elevator. The adrenaline was pumping and, in the confusion, this slight lapse of situational awareness almost costs the mission in the end.

Guns at the ready and Mr. President mashing the down arrow about 20 times already, Secret Service Man (SSM) watches their back. The bad guys could come from any direction. The elevator lights up and finally one of the doors begins to open. “Wait, we have to play it cool. What if the bad guys are on the elevator but they don’t know yet” says SSM. “Good call, we should act like nothing’s happening” replies Mr. President.

Look Cool…Be Cool…

The doors slide open and there’s a couple random people that could very well be bad guys, but they don’t know. *Elevator music cuts in as the Mission Impossible music fades* Mr. President and SSM smile and casually walk on to the elevator. SSM hits garage level button and they strategically work to the back so they can keep an eye on the suspects. Looks like they are getting off early, good.

A few tense moments go by as Mr. President and SSM watch every move they make, hands ready to point their guns fingers at them and yell “Freeze.” The unsuspecting bystanders get off at their floor having no idea what they were just about to get into. As soon as the doors close again Mission Impossible is back on. This time as the elevator reaches a stop, they would have to make a break for it. *Ding*

Is It Time To Panic?!

The speed walk was the sure-fire way to beat the bad guys without looking crazy sprinting through the hotel. If they ran maybe someone would think they stole something and try to stop them. If the bad guys saw them speed walking, it would be too late to catch up by the time they realized what was happening. So Mr. President and SSM burst out of the elevator with the fastest speed walk ever seen. They breezed past all the bad guys leaving no trace that anything was up.

The quickest way to find the limo was of course to “panic button” it. By now they were so far ahead of the bad guys they just needed to shock and awe with how quick they could get the briefcase and get out of there. Once they grabbed the nuclear codes, they made there way back through the garage toward the elevator. Luckily, there was an elevator already at the bottom and ready to go when they got back.

Wrong Way!!

At this point all they had to do was get off the elevator and make it back into the room. *DING* There’s no more speed walking, it’s time to full out sprint the hallway and bust in the door. There is only one problem. The hallway is totally symmetrical, and the elevators are on both sides of the hallway. Mr. President jumped out of the elevator and instinctively broke right remembering the last time they came back up to the room.

SSM knew this time they had gotten off the elevator from the opposite side of the hallway. “MR. PRESIDENT, YOU’RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!” Dazed and confused by the sudden complete change in which way is which, Mr. President sprinted back down the other direction and SSM cleared the way. The door opens and at last the mission is complete with the Nuclear Football safe.

It’s My Story And I’m Sticking To It

This isn’t exactly how the story happened, but it’s definitely the way I’d rather remember it. Not sure what year we went to Chattanooga or how old I was but it was a really awesome trip that I have a lot of different memories of. I know the big reason we were going was to see Lookout Mountain and find the place that one of our ancestors fought and died in the Civil War. I believe he carried a flag in the battle but I’m not totally sure.

What I remember is driving around in the car seeing the winding mountain views as we headed to the actual battlefield(s). It was really cool seeing the actual places that those battles were fought, knowing that it was the same soil those soldiers marched on. At the time I was probably not quite as excited about historical sites and reading plaques and all but looking back on it I really appreciate those moments.

                Another cool part of that trip I remember is going to Ruby Falls. That was such a cool place and I can see it like it was yesterday. Climbing down with the stalactites and stalagmites all over that took who knows how long to form. The cool colored lights all around so it’s not pitch-black underground. Then finally getting to the end and seeing the underground waterfall pouring out of the rock ceiling. I’ll never forget that place for sure.

Sticky Fingers!!!

Certainly, can’t forget about Sticky Fingers. That was the place and the moment I found my love for Ribs. Still to this day, there has never been another rib experience to beat that and I don’t think there will be. You just can’t replicate the family trip, the authentic restaurant, and the first time ever trying a food that will become a new favorite. I have tried the sauce on homemade ribs and everything, and it’s just never quite the same.

                This entire string of events is just one of those staple family memories that I have. It’s funny to look back on it and realize details that I’m sure aren’t actually how things happened or looked, but it’s the way I picture it in my head. I know that hotel wasn’t a massive skyrise, it just seemed really impressive to me as a kid because it was cool to stay at a nicer hotel and all. When we had to run down to the car to grab something, I couldn’t tell you exactly what it was we had to get, it turned into a mission impossible themed rescue that is forever burned into my memory.